Ever since I was a boy I painted spirals and circles. When I was sixteen, I painted the picture above which is basically a samsara circle with hidden spirals as well. A circle can be static, but spirals are always dynamic.
By the time I was 10, I saw spirals everywhere. You cut up a conch, you see a spiral. I found them even in stones and collected them.
Having a very graphic mind, finding spirals in universal design and microcosm design too, I began to speculate by myself that spiral is in fact a kind of writing.
The next logical question was...whose handwriting it may be?
Whatever someone writes, the writing stays the same. And so whose writing it is which can be found everywhere around us?
Conditioned by the idea that a person should mean conditioned as myself, I reigned over the idea of personal God, it seemed to be a little primitive. Nevertheless, the handwriting "was on the wall", I could see it every day.
I walked alone and silent, year after year (yes, I used to be a very silent boy! :-), feeling the uselessness of my empirical research, having nobody to share it with. The artists I knew were interesting people who always explored a new dimension of perceptions, but ultimately they ended up being fascinated with the external display of forms and colors, and stuck with it. The interplay of colors and forms that fascinated them was not enough for me. I felt that this is all external. I wanted to go deeper, understandig the mechanism of the mind, the ways how consciousness is motivating our actions (hence the painting bellow is full of symbols for different types of consciousness.
On the reverse, there is an entire dictionary:-)
I wanted to depict the cause, but still stuck with the effect, progressively desperate and disgusted by my empirical research. I guess the moment when math becomes philosophy, things become interesting. By the time the teacher painted the sideways eight on the board, symbolizing the infinitive, I just graduated from the school, feeling totally cheated about how they taught us always the strict rules of mathematics, when finally it is all infinitive, and there is no end to minus and no end to plus, the calculation with zero being actually a fictious turning point as zero never exists.
There is no nothing and there is no zero, and they taught us this absurdity the whole time!
FInally, entirely unexpected, Srila Prabhupada arrived on the scene in the form of His anarchistic minded German brahmacaries, who simply dragged me into their midst, who were not philosophers at all, but had one thing in common - they left the old illusory values totally behind and opened their hearts for whatever Srila Prabhupada gave us, serving Him up to the point of risking their lives.
Such devotion is difficult to find today, as if most devotees never leave their mental zones or emotionally built illusory shelters.
It was fascinating to see such dedication and single pointed intelligence in action, and it was easy to give up my empiric research and artistic career in exchange of many years of book distribution ecstasy.
The spiral continues, I see it everywhere, but now I know, thanks to Srila Prabhupada, that Krsna is at its beginning and He is at its end. He is the final definition of the infinitive, the embodiment of acintya, of all what we never will comprehend.
How amazing and how wonderful it is what Srila Prabhupada gave us!
He gave us the understanding we could never reach by our imperfect senses and our hallucinated mind. He showed us how wonderful everything can be, including the endless spiral and other features of the Krsna's creation. He showed us how beautiful Krsna's handwriting is.
All glories to His Divine Grace Srila Prabhupada!